The power of 911

Lois speech on 911 from the Family guy. It's hilarious because???? yeah 911...

Click here to read the full post.

Witnessed a murder today...

A newspaper clipping of a letter submitted by a reader. Check this out...

Click here to read the full post.

Millionaires!

Back in the old Wild West, there were two blonde cowpokes, Jeff and Dave. One day, the two were enjoying a strong sarsaparilla in the local saloon, when a man walked into the bar with an Indian’s head under his arm.

The barman shakes his hand and says, “I hate Indians; last week the bastards burnt my barn to the ground, assaulted my wife and killed my children.” He then says, “If any man brings me the head of an Indian, I’ll give him one thousand dollars.”

The two blondes looked at each other and walked out of the bar to go hunting for an Indian. They were walking around for a while when suddenly they saw one; Jeff threw a rock which hit the Indian right on the head.

The Indian fell off his horse, but landed seventy feet down a ravine. The two nuts made their way down the ravine where Dave pulled out a knife to claim their trophy.

Suddenly, Jeff said, “Dave, take a look at this.” Dave replied, “Not now, I’m busy.”

Jeff tugged him on the shoulder and says, “I really think you should look at this.”

Dave said, “Look, you can see I’m busy. There’s a thousand dollars in my hand.”

But Jeff was adamant. “Please, Dave, take a look at this.”

So Dave looked up and saw that standing at the top of the ravine were five thousand red Indians.

Dave just shook his head and said, “Oh . . . my . . . God . . .. we’re going to be millionaires!”

Click here to read the full post.

How to determine the height of a skyscraper with a barometer?

The following concerns a question in a physics degree exam at the University of Copenhagen:

"Describe how to determine the height of a skyscraper with a barometer."

One student replied:
"You tie a long piece of string to the neck of the barometer, then lower the barometer from the roof of the skyscraper to the ground. The length of the string plus the length of the barometer will equal the height of the building."
This highly original answer so incensed the examiner that the student was failed immediately. The student appealed on the grounds that his answer was indisputably correct, and the university appointed an independent arbiter to decide the case. The arbiter judged that the answer was indeed correct, but did not display any noticeable knowledge of physics.
To resolve the problem it was decided to call the student in and allow him six minutes in which to provide a verbal answer which showed at least a minimal familiarity with the basic principles of physics. For five minutes the student sat in silence, forehead creased in thought. The arbiter reminded him that time was running out, to which the student replied that he had several extremely relevant answers, but couldn't make up his mind which to use.
On being advised to hurry up the student replied as follows:
"Firstly, you could take the barometer up to the roof of the skyscraper, drop it over the edge, and measure the time it takes to reach the ground. The height of the building can then be worked out from the formula (H = 0.5g x t squared). But bad luck on the barometer."
"Or if the sun is shining you could measure the height of the barometer, then set it on end and measure the length of its shadow. Then you measure the length of the skyscraper's shadow, and thereafter it is a simple matter of proportional arithmetic to work out the height of the skyscraper."
"But if you wanted to be highly scientific about it, you could tie a short piece of string to the barometer and swing it like a pendulum, first at ground level and then on the roof of the skyscraper. The height is worked out by the difference in the gravitational restoring force T = 2 pi sq.root(l/g)."
"Or if the skyscraper has an outside emergency staircase, it would be easier to walk up it and mark off the height of the skyscraper in barometer lengths, then add them up."

"If you merely wanted to be boring and orthodox about it, of course, you could use the barometer to measure the air pressure on the roof of the skyscraper and on the ground, and convert the difference in millibars into feet to give the height of the building."
"But since we are constantly being exhorted to exercise independence of mind and apply scientific methods, undoubtedly the best way would be to knock on the janitor's door and say to him 'If you would like a nice new barometer, I will give you this one if you tell me the height of this skyscraper'."

The student's name was Niels Bohr, the only Dane to win the Nobel prize for Physics. I don't know whether it's true or false. But it sure is amazing.

Click here to read the full post.

Girl humiliates herself at Ice Hockey Game

First, she forgets the words to the US National Anthem. Then secondly....hi hi..check for yourself...

Click here to read the full post.

Lucky not to have you as friends...

After watching this video, I'm thankful to god that I don't know these guys. They partied whole night and this guy passed out. Look where he found himself next morning. Definitely do not pass out around these guys.

Click here to read the full post.

What will you do when scared?

Check out what some others did....

Click here to read the full post.

Pollice story : the ticket

GOOD : Madison , WI , policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't getting many. Then he discovered the problem - a 12-year old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign, which read "RADAR TRAP AHEAD". The officer also found the boy had an accomplice who was a bit further down the road with a sign reading "TIPS" and a bucket full of money. (And we used to just sell lemonade!)

BETTER : A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar post in La Crosse , WI . A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being a wise guy, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo of handcuffs.

BEST : A young woman was pulled over for speeding. A Wisconsin State Trooper walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she said, "I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the State Trooper's Ball. He replied, "Wisconsin State Troopers don't have balls."
There was a moment of silence. He then closed his book, got back in his patrol car and left.

Click here to read the full post.

Mission Accomplished

On the evening of their 50th anniversary, a reminiscing wife found the negligee she wore on her wedding night and put it on. She went to her husband, a retired Marine pilot, and said, "Honey, do you remember this?"
He looked up from his newspaper and said, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married."
She said, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that night?"
He nodded and said, "Yes dear, I still remember."
"Well, what was it?"she asked.
He was not much in the mood for this, but, he sighed and responded, "Well,honey, as I remember, I said; 'Oh baby, I'm going to suck the life out of those boobs and screw your brains out.' "
She giggled and said; "Yes dear, that's it. That's exactly what you
said. So now it's fifty years later, and I'm in the same negligee.
What do you have to say ton ight?"
He looked her up and down and replied, "Mission accomplished."

Click here to read the full post.