Complains from the Penis

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A penis writes a letter to the head complaining about his salary and looking for a raise...

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

*I do physical labor.

*I work at great depths.

*I plunge head first into everything I do.

*I do not get weekends or holidays off.

*I work in a damp environment.

*I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.

*I work in high temperatures.

*I am willing to work any shift.

*My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

The response to his request was the following:

Dear Penis,
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

*You do not work 8 hours straight.

*You fall asleep after brief work periods.

*You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

*You do not stay in your designated work area and are often seen visiting other locations.

*You do not take initiative, you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

*You leave your workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

*You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.

*You will retire well before you are 65.

*You are unable to work double shifts.

*You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

*And if that were not enough, you have been constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely,
The Management