April fool jokes
Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady: I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own
words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in
my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney: Did you know him?
Little Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down?
Little Old Lady: He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady: No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done
that since my Abner died some 30 years ago.
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Little Old Lady: He began to rub my breasts.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady: No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Little Old Lady: His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Little Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling
so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him, "Take me, young man. Take me!"
Defense Attorney: Did he take you?
Little Old Lady:: Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fool!" And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.
Little Old Lady: I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own
words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in
my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney: Did you know him?
Little Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down?
Little Old Lady: He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady: No, I didn't stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done
that since my Abner died some 30 years ago.
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Little Old Lady: He began to rub my breasts.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady: No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Little Old Lady: His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Little Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling
so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him, "Take me, young man. Take me!"
Defense Attorney: Did he take you?
Little Old Lady:: Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fool!" And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.
Labels: April fool joke, April fools day, Attorney joke
Koutuk from Dhaka, Bangladesh. 
1 Comments:
希望大家都會非常非常幸福~
「朵朵小語‧優美的眷戀在這個世界上，最重要的一件事，就是好好愛自己。好好愛自己，你的眼睛才能看見天空的美麗，耳朵才能聽見山水的清音。好好愛自己，你才能體會所有美好的東西，所有的文字與音符才能像清泉一樣注入你的心靈。好好愛自己，你才有愛人的能力，也才有讓別人愛上你的魅力。而愛自己的第一步，就是切斷讓自己覺得黏膩的過去，以無沾無滯的輕快心情，大步走向前去。愛自己的第二步，則是隨時保持孩子般的好奇，願意接受未知的指引；也隨時可以拋卻不再需要的行囊，一路雲淡風輕。親愛的，你是天地之間獨一無二的旅人，在陽光與月光的交替之中瀟灑獨行.............................................................................................................有時，你覺得痛。胃痛的時候，接受它，承認這個疼痛是你的身體的一部份，與它和平共處。心痛的時候，接受它，承認這個經驗是你的生命的一部份，與它和平共處。抗拒痛的存在，只會讓它更要證明它的存在，於是你就更痛。所以，.無論你有多麼不喜歡痛的感覺，還是要接納這個痛的事實。與你的痛站在同一邊，不逃避，不閃躲，不再與你的痛爭執，如此，你的痛才會漸漸不再胡鬧，才會乖乖平息下去。.................心願-你許下了一個心願，你閉上眼睛，在冥想之中把這個心願交託宙給宇整個讓宇宙推動它全部的力.量去執行.，你看見星球與星球的引力牽繫著彼此，你聽見虛空與虛空.唱裡著和妙美的聲音，為了你的心願，整個宇宙正在相互傳遞，然後你放下了心願，不僅是放下，最好你還把你的心願忘記，唯有如此，它才能脫離你，發展它自己，
當它在宇宙的遊歷結束之後，它自然會來到你身邊，以你曾經希望的方式回應你，許下，只是讓它發生，放下，才是讓>它實現，你的心願使你懂得不能執著的奧秘...................
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